i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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