True but thats because hes a fetus.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
