I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
