I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize