I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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