Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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