Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
