I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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