It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
