you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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