dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
