Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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