the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
