You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
