I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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