Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
