so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
