i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize