After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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