THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
