I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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