508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
