idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
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