btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
