You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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