He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
