:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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