i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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