I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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