It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
