Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
