was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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