what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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