i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
