Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
