It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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