Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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