she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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