everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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