we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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