I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize