Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize