i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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