walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
