you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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