Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
