she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
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If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize