I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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