Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
