so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Randomize